‘Eau d’Asbo’

By Jeff Coleman
August 31 2010

Our normally reluctant reporter Jeff Coleman , having twisted his arm has willingly agreed to report on the 2's. A disappointing day in front of a bumper crowd. He has however captured the mood, described some dodgy pads and perhaps a secret presentation.

I have managed to avoid being the reporter a number of times in the past but having eulogised the 2’s this season I felt obliged to say yes to Kev this time, although I write this somewhat disappointed and embarrassed by today’s performance.

Having read a number of previous reports I was at a loss as to which style to follow and started making copious notes of all aspects of the day. Of course my work ethic declined with MCCC’s fortunes.

I left home at 9:47 and drove via Eastcote, Pinner, Hatch End, Harrow Weald, Stanmore and Elstree to Radlett. It took 35 minutes and was incident free.

The weather at Radlett was dry, sunny but bloody cold in the wind. There were a great many pot followers seen for the first time this year as the competition neared its end.

Middlesex won the toss and, surprisingly to many, batted. I later heard that Lancs would also have batted. The reason was that it was a worn pitch that would take spin and be difficult to bat on later. Only true, of course, if you post a big enough total first up.

2 wickets went down in the first over for 1 run. Soon followed by the 3^rd with the score on 21. A short period of consolidation by Scollay and Davy took the score to 48 before they were both out within 3 runs of each other. The best hope now was to bat out the overs and hope the earlier reading of the wicket proved true.

At this point my assistant reporter ‘ammersmith Les used the pavilion facilities shared with the MCCC dressing room. He reported that his visit followed that of Danny Evans and he returned using the phrase 'Eau d'Asbo'.  Not sure what he meant but I report it anyway.

Ben Scott came in at 7 with the score 51-5 and his job was to marshal the innings through 50 overs. This he did, being top scorer with 37no at close with the score moving on to 159. Nothing flamboyant but did his job and showed that he is not a bad bat after all.

During the lunch break there was great excitement as to when the highlight of the day ‘The Hog Roast’ would be ready. A countdown was given and on the 10 minute warning a long queue started to form including many of the first team squad, coaching staff, office staff and even some of those guys we generally see in the committee room and entertainment tents. All paying their £4 a go. Experience had told me to hold back until later when portion control is forgotten. A result.

We also had the announcement of the raffle on behalf of the Radlett Redevelopment fund and Breakthrough, as well as an apology that there was no spot betting tent at the ground today.

The Lancs innings got underway and with a run rate of only 3.2 needed we wanted a quick breakthrough. It didn’t come and the result never looked in doubt. Opener Warren Goodwin almost carried his bat for 72 and they ran out winners by 6 wickets with 7.4 overs left. Ravi Patel taking 3 of the 4 wickets to fall.

But hold on.

Point of order.

The Lancs keeper wore white pads over his red pyjamas as did a number of the batsmen. The reason given was that as the firsts were playing the Unicorns at Colwyn Bay they did not have enough red pads to go around. Clearly worth an appeal to the ECB/ICC to have the result overturned for incorrect clothing for the competition.

Or do we think that the authorities have enough on their plate at the moment?

Following the close of play I understand there might have been a presentation of some sort to the winners. But it was done in a secret venue with all punters, even MCC members excluded. Giles Clarke managed not to smile during the presentation ceremony.

I applaud the work put into the day by Radlett Cricket Club. In fact, not just today but all season. The day had a real family feel with many of the first teamers bringing their families with them. I also want to congratulate Jonno on an excellent first year as coach of the 2’s and assure those that have not seen much of his side that today was an aberration.

In summary, although the result was disappointing for the bumper bank holiday crowd (see I did get it in Les) it was an enjoyable day and a perfect cricketing antidote to the news of the previous day.