"Golden Arm MK2"?

By The Diamond Ruled OK
June 2 2012

Yes it's 23:45 hrs, well passed my bedtime but hey guys and girls your worth it. Here's the match report for day 4 v Sussex.

A lateish start up to Lord's due to the usual Saturday stuff saw me catch the Heathrow Connect from Ealing Broadway into Paddington rather than the slower Central Line train,leadened skies still but hey ho it's summer time. Bakerloo line to Marylabone a quick walk then a 139 bus up to the ground and still in time for the start of play,spooky how sometimes the later you leave leaving the earlier you get somewhere.A brew in the Allen with Phil"the power" Taylor who was already there (way overdressed) and Dingy Bags who arrived soon after I did then upstairs to watch the game unfold.

First over from Hi Fi is a bit loose and an all run four by Nash won't help our bowling rate.Well fielded by a couple of our guys down on the Warner fence but all to no avail.Dial M opens from the Nursery End infront of a rather small crowd.50 up for Sussex at the 12.2 over mark.In the 13th ove Hi Fi removs Nash's middle pole when he has scored 40 well deserved runs(58/2).

A smoke break fails to get us a wicket but soon after I sat down again Goodwin is gone for 5,caught Raynor bd Finn.(64/3)Phils wicket (he was off buying the coffees at the time).
Beefy and LP have arrived with the prospect of Kev,Kimmy and Spillage jooining us during the day,a right old MTWD crowd being gathered. The noise levelo increases as both Beefy and LP appear to have colds.

The next wicket was down to a group effort,three smokers out of the stand at once so Iceman decides it is time the seriously out of touch Gatting got an early lunch (something his uncle would appreciate),out LBW for 18 (83/4). Five down before lunch I had said on arriving would be a good mornings session,TRJ has a good appeal against Yardy turned down(bit of bat in there I thought).
Someone somewhere has told HI Fi he can be a good gulley fielder,well he proved that with a corker of a catch to remove Wright for 13 bowled by the Iceman.(101/5),soon becomes 101/6 as Moggy holds a good catch off TRJ to remove Yardy for 10.
Iceman then "scones" Gondal(he of the many names) and the ball bouces yards off his lid,so much so at the end of the over all the Middle guys ask if he is ok.Over rate currently -2 and lunchtaken with Sussex 102/6,morning session belongs to the Middle.

Kev's shown up text updates no longer required.Pinky the Panther joins us (not in his working skin) and LP is busy explaining how he has problems with his google(that's old age for you fella) and gets Pinky to "hardcopy" his twitter addy for him(with the loan of a pencil and paper from me). Play appears to drag but our over rate gets back to red zero with no apparent change to the bowling staff,one Don Shelley,there's only one Don Shelley!!Gondal seems to be taking forever to score runs but Brown the other end looks quite competant.
Sussex reach 128/6 off 50 overs leaving 56 to be bowled in the day.

We now learn that Fletch has been barred from the Middlesex room for turning up in beach bum shorts and flip flops,the abuse he suffered on text thereafter was well deserved.Waving at him in the Tavern stand from the top of the Allen was neither big nor clever,infact it was purile and stupid if you ask me,ok I sent him a text or five but what the heck.

Gondal and Brown bring up their 50 partnership of which the former has contributed 14 runs,the troops are getting restless and blaming Kev for the fact that since he arrived a wicket has not fallen. A tactical and Gondals gonedall for 15 in what seems like three and a half weeks caught Malan bd Berg(super low catch)164/7.
"one gets two","good time for a hattrick" LP'isms flying all over the place,Olly on to bowl and the over rate goes back to -2, someone really needs to explain this to us mere mortals.

Brown reaches a well deserved 50 and next ball tries to reverse sweep Olly,Iceman snaffles up the catch and he's gone for 53 (Sussex 170/8),still 38 runs short of asking us to bat again.Olly got the wicket but Bergatelli is bowling fast and hard,conversation drifts to Tiswas v Swap Shop and the conclusion is Sally James was a lot better looking than Noel Edmonds.One for the kiddies there. Over rate back to minus 1 and then red zero about 2 mins later (Don working that old magic again?) Tea taken with Sussex 191-8 ,in many ways their session.Two wickets in the session and we are all blaming Kev by now,offers of him being paid to go home meet with no response though.

Post tea AC opens the bowling and we move out of the Allen upper into the Tavern stand as the sun has finally got his hat on ,hip ,hip,hip,hip horrray!!Bowls Magoffin a pie(steak and kidney) which gets dispatched into the Mound stand for six,in the same over a chicken and mushroom four ball to the Grandstand and then with a Beef Wellington ball has the same player caught TRJ for 37 and it's Monty time,the stewards leave the gate open but one of Englands most popular cricketers is greeted by warm applause from home and away support alike,Lord we English love a trier.You couldn't have scripted it better, after a few prods and pushes Monty smacks AC straight down Hi Fi's throat and Sussex are 225 all out,the seamers and Olly bent their backs and "Golden arm" has 2-19 off 3.l4 overs,those are the breaks I suppose (could have been 2-9, minus the pie chucking :) ).

Now I could go into ball by ball detail on how we struggled to get the 18 runs required to win but if I told you the first of them was a wide from Gatting you might get the idea of how it went.All over inside 4 overs and Breakthrough is up another £7 due to nobody winning the "finish time sweep",Beefy was close but not exact. A 23 point win for the MIddle which keeps us right up there coming towards the turn in the season.

A few more beers in the Tavern half watching England v Belgium chatting to some of the players and then carriages about 8pm,the rain had kicked in by then but not soon enough to save Sussex. As Del Boy would say,23 point win.....luvely Jubbly.