It gets Worcester and Worser


Our man of match

By Beefy and Leprechaun Texts
September 26 2015

Beefy Roberts (BR) live from New Road and the London Leprechaun (LL) our designated match reporter who understandably whimped out provide Barmy Kev (BK) with a report based on unedited texts throughout day. This is not pretty reading and please excuse the bad language at the end.    

 

(LL) I've given up on Worcester. Missed the train I was going to get so wouldn't get there before lunch now as you say our hopes are Felled.  

(BR) Good news Fell out for 171 . I sat here for 2.5 days and missed the bloody wicket.

(LL) Do we have N over rate mole there.

(BR) OR started on -2 . Now -1. Shayne Rayner bowling.

(BR) Or - 1 as Whitley out

(BR) 400-5 109 overs gone . OR plus 1, that's PLUS 1 not a spelling error.

(BR) 431 -5 dec. 333 runs behind . OR on plus 1, repeat plus 1 

(LL) So we'll get one pint from this match Glad I've wiped out. 

(LL) KH  is trying to work out we can still win the match. And they call me optimistic.

(BR) Finny made a guest appearance at lunch, bowling as wee.. We gave him applause , few cheers and he was laughing.

(BR)  Worcs 52-3 OR -4 .

(BK) From work-  Can't we declare and just rely on Hants.

Now we will forget the score as we have a series of texts from Beefy as we collapse. If you're under 18 please look away.

disgraceful showing

Total fixing comedy

Appalling end of season

Down right damn bloody pathetic showing

FUCKING USELESS 

 

And from the restrained Leprechaun 

 Middlesex batting collapse.com back in business . And we're clustering again. End of seasonitis.  

So we lose to Champions and the bottom county and we have to support Hampshire tomorrow even though that might relegate Sussex. Do not like that. 

 

From Anon usually reliable source- rumour we signed Bopara and Footit.

 

 

 

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It gets Worcester and Worser
Discussion started by Middlesex till we die , 26/09/2015 18:34
Middlesex till we die
26/09/2015 18:34
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Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2015:09:29:08:13:15 by BarmierKev.

chunkyinargyll
26/09/2015 19:55
I hope the last bit is untrue.

Steve Finn is on record as saying he thinks Tom Helm will play for England. Maybe we got lucky this year with no injuries to Harris, TRJ, and Murtagh, but another signing will mean another player having to look elsewhere for first team opportunities.

Next year I was hoping a fit Helm would get about 6 championship matches so we could see if he was good enough.

More ammunition to supporters of other counties who say we don't grow our own.

BarmierKev
26/09/2015 20:29
It has to be said I wouldn't say no to Bopara.

The text came from a source who was first with Compo when it seemed unlikely.

Barmy Kev
I'm only here for the tele

chunkyinargyll
26/09/2015 20:33
I wouldn't say no to Amanda Holden- but that doesn't mean I'd want Gus to sign her!

Jonathan Winsky
26/09/2015 22:34
There is a possibility that both Ravi Bopara and Mark Footitt will be moving this winter, as the most recent contract Bopara signed at Essex covered only the 2015 season, while Footitt is contracted to Derbyshire for 2016 but last month rejected an extension. I am sure that both would like to play in division one, although I am not sure how realistic it is that Middlesex will sign them, and thus I am not sure how seriously I should take these rumours.

I don’t think we will need another fast bowler unless we have some injuries or call-ups. However, I would definitely like Bopara at the club, as he can address two of our weaknesses, which are the absence of a true all-rounder and the lack of players suited to limited-overs cricket. Indeed, when I heard he was out-of-contract 12 months ago, I was very hopeful he would sign for Middlesex, so I am glad he seems to be back on the market again.

The Diamond ruled ok
27/09/2015 06:50
On the grounds that this source got the Franklin/Compton deals bang on, I'm prepared to believe it far more than the Rankin rumour earlier in the month.

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